I was talking to a runner friend earlier this month about her experience with someone and it got me thinking about the different types of people you encounter in every community. My friend was working towards the Boston marathon by way of a charity bib - meaning she was earning her spot through fundraising and a lot of it. She’s raised $11,000 so far, surpassing her fundraising goal and still going because the cause is dear to her heart. I admire this because let’s be real, fundraising is HARD. I could argue it’s harder than simply buying your way into the race with a qualifying time. There is more time, dedication and heart that goes into it. Because you’re training while simultaneously working hard to raise funds for a cause. She’s also doing all this on top of going to school and going to work. The person she spoke to, spoke to her like she didn’t deserve a spot on the race course simply because she didn’t have a qualifying time, and scoffed at the alternative of raising money to earn her spot.
For the most part, everyone I have encountered have been welcoming, supportive, encouraging and very helpful when I have questions and need help in my training. When I feel like I’m not enough, they uplift me and tell me I’m doing great, even when I feel like I’m not and I’m nowhere near their level. They do this because they see the work you’re putting in and that already speaks volumes. I love this in a community because it helps you feel like not only is there room to grow, but that they are not your competition. Only you are. They are simply there to help guide you and be your cheerleader as you embark on your own journey through it.
But there is always that one group of people of people who not only make you feel like you’re not enough, but that you don’t belong. I found these people in cosplay as well - the ones that scoff if you don’t make your own costume, that you added to cart, that you ‘took the easy way out,’ when the whole point is to just have fun. Well, the same group of people exist in running. The ones that don’t feel like you’re a “real” runner because you don’t have a qualifying time, because you don’t wear x brand of running shoes, you don’t use a Garmin watch, your training plan doesn’t involve repeats, tempo runs, etc. The list goes on. But the good news is, this is not the majority. Even elite runners I’ve encountered are more kind and encouraging than this. The snobs, it seems, aren’t even that elite. They’re the ones who just barely made the qualifying time, sometimes. 99% of the time, this stems from insecurity. They thrive off making other people feel small, to make themselves feel bigger. But a person who needs someone to dim their light in order for them to brighten their own, obviously isn’t impressive at all. Remember, it says more about them, than it will ever say about you. Don’t let them get you down because that’s what they want; misery loves company.
Listen, I have never been fast. I’ve never been good at sports, or gym class or anything ‘active.’ When I took up running back in 2018, I didn’t think I was going to make it or last this long on the wagon. Hell, I didn’t think I’d ever complete the half marathon I had signed up for in 2019 and I sure as hell had no intention of ever completing a full marathon, let alone a Dopey. I thought running was something you had to be good at. You had to work up to being crazy Olympic fast. Which is why I thought I would never succeed at this. But I learned as time went on, through many supportive people, that this is something I CAN do. Running is a self improvement sport. You don’t have to be faster than the person next to you. You just have to have the determination and the drive. You just have to WANT it.
Like I said, I have never been fast. But I work hard, practice discipline and am extremely determined once I set my mind to something. I learned from a community of supportive runners and Jeff Galloway himself that simply putting one foot in front of the other and going forward makes you a runner; not how fast you can run, how often/little/many breaks you take. There is no “qualifying” time that officially makes one a runner. What makes you a runner? You just run.
This year, I did the RunDisney Princess weekend a little differently. I took it slower and ran/walked alongside a friend to help her complete her 5k and her first 10k. I wanted her to have a good experience and love RunDisney as much as I do, without focusing on the time and wondering if she’s “fast enough” and “keeping up.” To me, if you are putting in the time and training, and do the work, you are doing more than enough. And another thing; that’s what I love about RunDisney - the people on the course! As you run through the sea of people, everyone has a story. I see families running with t-shirts on their backs honoring a passed loved one who couldn’t be here today and that’s why they’re running. You see the stories on the big jumbotrons while waiting for the race to start, of the athletes who overcame physical disabilities, health issues, and more, and their dream is to complete this, to prove that this obstacle in life did not define them. I see the cute elderly couples pushing through the course, hand in hand. Literally everyone has a story and that’s what I love most about these races. Everyone deserves a place on the field and they will not be boxed into a pace to define their worth.
So. Don’t let anyone EVER tell you that you shouldn’t take up space or have a spot at the table. YOU are enough and don’t let anyone ever tell you otherwise because you don’t meet their definition of what a “runner” looks like.
THOSE are the people who don’t belong there. Whether it’s a 6 minute mile or a 20 minute mile, it’s still a mile. I don’t believe in gatekeeping fitness just because you don’t have a “qualifying time.” You did something amazing and you deserve to shine, show off and celebrate your hard work. Be proud and wear those medals you earned!
I also want to say running has also taught me a lot about life since I started. It’s not cheap; it’s actually very expensive, lol. Listen, all these Disney races add up. All these sneakers you have to buy, both training and race day sneakers, add up. Race-cations take over your life. Running also is a form of therapy. You work out a lot of shit in your head during those long runs when you’re alone with your thoughts. You also learn a lot what your favorite songs are to put on repeat when you need to crush through a long run. But most of all, what running has taught me is that if I honestly put my mind to something, I can do anything. It taught me discipline and dedication when I set aside 6 months of my life to dedicate to Dopey training. To some people, running is just running, but to me, it helped me get through a lot of shit in the past few years. It helped keep me on track when I was going through a lot of mental health issues, it helped give me goals to work towards and it taught me how good it feels to see something through that you worked so hard for and didn’t give up on no matter how much you wanted to. That feeling of accomplishment when you cross the finish line, I will never be able to put into words but nearly every person I’ve convinced to do it with me has experienced it and can understand how impactful it is on your life. It’s a high you can’t replicate. And it’s powerful. It truly makes you feel like you can do anything and what other mountains can I climb? It’s that life-changing. I know to non-runners, it’s just running. But if you’re a runner, well, if you know, you know.
This applies to a lot more than just running in life, but the gist of this post is to say, don’t let anyone discourage you from working on your dream just because you don’t meet their definitions or standards. You will always be enough and you will find your tribe that welcomes you and gets you. All you have to do is be unapologetically you.
